Reflection brings perspective and clarity.
But also points you to where you gone wrong and how different actions could have led to different outcomes.
You realise that in some some battles the casualties are far too great to justify the fight.
You realise that you are combatant in an endless and waisted conflict that is not worthy of being pursued.
And that you are wasting precious resources on a futile and waisted effort.
Why not rather focus on the small battles won and forget about the raging war and the constant hope of the spoils it might render.
However, it’s easier said than done.
I think at the risk of sounding like I know, I am of the opinion that the very energy used to constantly engage in wasted fighting should be utilised in moving towards that which is positive and focus on the gifts you have in your life and in recognising them and appreciating them, more joy and happiness will fill your world and the people who shares it with you.
So go on!
Follow the song in your heart and forget the noise in your mind that is keeping you on the battlefield and is bogging you down.
It is now close to six months ago when I took a crazy leap into the unknown. My only companion being faith, trust and a love I believed in. The words, -”Why don’t you marry her?”- felt like a stranger violating my speech and abusing my voice to manipulate an emotion filled situation. What was I to do; think? It had to be a divine intervention. What other explanation can be ascribed when a sane, normal and happily married woman suggests that her husband of almost two decades, marry another woman? Have I lost it or was there a bigger hand at play here. In my defense I have to declare that the woman I proposed my husband to marry was my best friend.
After lengthy discussions between two, three and two, we came to the conclusion that this is what we wanted. I coached, guided, advised my husband how to court his soon to be new bride. His courting skills rusty, forgotten and awkward. Step by step I did it. The sweet worded sms. The well-timed phone call. The odd bunch of flowers. And constant reminders of sweet words, appropriate compliments and romantic and sweet actions to enhance and help blossom this new and growing love. All the while being an onlooker on something beautiful between two people I love dearly and deeply. I could see the love blossoming. My husband smiling, whispering and missing his new love. The excitement in his eyes at the thought of seeing her; the sweetness in his voice when he spoke to her. I step aside. I make space for them. This is a good thing. My friend is glowing, she seem happy for the first time. I knew he would be the right person to heal her wounds and take away her pain. I see her growing into a bold and daring butterfly. Only remnants of the once fearful person she was is still visible from time to time. I did good. I got those I love to love even more.